second poem on this page Where Rides the Devil or God

Excerpts From: the stoned Biker diaries  

 

Where Rides the Devil or God

 

 

I was higher than a kite, on that night,

I was burnt, wired an lit

God and the Devil were there, on the level!

They were arguing general shit

 

“AAH HUH?” said God, given the Devil a nod

“You want this one?”

Hands on his hips the Devil pursed his lips,

He queried, “ Might be fun! “

 

I reached for my poke, rolled a bigger toke,

I struck it to fire.

God sneezed and the Devil wheezed.

I sunk deeper in my mire.

 

God looked down, with a frown

He said, “This guys a fake!”

“Full blown, on home grown,

and he is only half baked!”

 

“Hey! Ether of you two, want a brew?

No! ok don’t say I never asked”

God’s halo twitched, the Devil just bitched

In the after affect I basked.

 

Hey!! The point I’m thinking is the joint

But the question is why?”

God blinked, the Devil winked

I know said I

 

God smirked “Your such a little jerk!”

“You think I’d waste the time?”

who’s rowing this boat, the Devil cleared his throat

I smiled like a stunned mime

 

God rolled his eyes, the devil’s getting wise,

They inhaled the second hand smoke.

I climbed on the cloud, were God sat proud.

if youse guys ain’t buyin I’m goin broke!

 

“Should I smite this sod?” the Devil asked of God

I rolled two giant twisty ends,

I offered one to the fallen and one to the Son.

They looked at each other like long lost friends,

 

 

It was fuzzy like snowing my buzz was going.

The Devil got the raving munchies

God says it’s going to my head, I think I need a bed

God faded and the Devil grabbed my crunchies

 

Than came John and Brad, looking all sad

Pull up a stool

 

 

Freaking Easter Bunny



Myself I'd just done with the ides' of March
I'd picked a bud or two of the crop to dry
My shorts had seen away to much starch
The chafin was about to make me cry

So I rolled the buds nice and thin.
Sitting on my favorite porch swing,
looking over the freshly mowed lawn an garbage bin.
I lit one, inhaled my brain went zing

I saw him then, a hopping big and furry thing
Carrying a woven basket filled with colored eggs.
Another toke and I whistled like Bing
He dropped his basket and sat on his hind legs

“I'm the Easter Bunny no one can see!” said he
As I offered him one of my smokes
Hopping on over he inhaled and said to me
Through the clouds of holy tokes

“Well my fuzzy long eared friend.”, said I
“Did ya leave me a chocolate egg?”
Inhaling smoke under a clear blue sky
“just check under your highway peg!”

He waved a paw and said 'Thanks for the smoke!”
I need to be on my way, eggs to hide an all that.”
“Who are you talking to? Asked my honey
“Oh just a word with the Easter bunny.”

“Right dear, now put out your smoke an come to lunch.”
“Ok, but he told me where to find your basket!”
My Lady said “you know I love you a whole bunch”
“Still I think you've blown a gasket!”

Stubbing it out, but first a last long toke
I took her hand, “To the bike shed my dear.”
She looked at me like it was a joke!